Why Not
by Jyo-Chan
Summary: The question you’ve been asking for a long time might not turn out to be the question you wanted to ask in the first place. Axel x Roxas -For Riica-


The question you've been asking for a long time might not turn out to be the question you wanted to ask in the first place. Axel x Roxas (For Riica)

This is totally whacked out by the way. I have absolutely no idea, NO IDEA, what so ever of what I was thinking when I typed this out. I might've been high on crack or pot or whatever shit. Not that I'm actually a druggy or anything. It was just a metaphor. Seriously, it's true!

Oh yeah, one last note, this one-shot is dedicated to Riica who helped me reached the 1,000 review hit for my story 'For a Change'! Woot, woot!! Thanks mucho mi amigo!! Lawls.

Seriously, that story sort of sucked, it needs a revamp…(Safety hat and drill on the ready.)

* * *

I woke up to a bunch of girls squealing in my house. It was loud, it was distinct. I cracked my eyes opened and immediately wondered, why.

I squeezed my eyes shut and prayed that it was only the nightmare I had just now about being stuck in a room full of babies. Man that was horrible.

Then I heard the squealing again, and I knew that the girls that were now climbing up the stairs were the ones to induce the nightmare in the first place.

I groaned as I climbed out of my bed and stalked out of my room in time to see the girls half-way up the stairs, and again, I wondered, why.

"Oh Roxas!" the blonde girl smiled at me as she climbed up the last step, "We were just about to go get you." they giggled at me. I figured it was because I was still in my pajamas.

My peach pajamas with moogles on it. It was my mother's idea. She said it was cute.

I merely stared at them and I was about to ask them if they had _any_ idea what time it was (please note the sarcasm) but I was sure they already knew.

"Roxas, it's almost 1 in the afternoon and you're still sleeping?" Namine creased her eyebrows as she smiled at me.

"Actually..." I began my excuse as I shifted my eyes away from them momentarily before looking back at them, "I had a really sore back, so I tried to get rid of it by sleeping it off."

"Did it work?" Olette asked curiously as she stood behind the blonde girl.

"No..." my face remained blank as I started towards the bathroom.

"We can give you a massage if you want," I paused mid-step and my face fell as they giggled at me again.

"No thanks..." I waved my hand back at them as they continued to giggle.

"Ok, we'll be downstairs." I heard their descent back to the first storey as I pushed the bathroom door open.

"Sure." I shrugged. I planned to hole myself up in my room anyways. I knew they were trying to help with my dilemma, but this is ridiculous...

It was strange though, how I found out about myself. It was as though I suddenly realized...that I might not be as straight as I thought I would be. And frankly, that thought scared the shit out of me. So I rushed up to Namine yesterday after school and begged for her help.

And I never beg, never. Not unless my life depended on it and I was on the verge of falling off a cliff, like I was hanging on a life line by a mere thread.

* * *

"NAMINE! You _have_ to help me!" I grabbed her shoulder roughly and shook her slightly. "I think I'm…" I swallowed as I tried to utter out the next word, "…gay." I harshly whispered out the next bit, I didn't really want other people to know about it.

And you know what she did? She laughed at me. Can you believe that? I was going through a crisis, and she was laughing at me...geez...

"What makes you think that you're gay?" she asked with a giggle and I tried to silence her by loudly shushing.

"I don't know!" I whined and released her shoulders, "I mean, I hang out with you guys a lot, and I hang out with the other guys a lot but why don't I ever get that weird feeling when I'm surrounded by girls? Is it because I got use to hanging out with you guys? Or is it because…Argh! Does that even make sense?! Fucking hell..." I slapped my forehead.

"Now, now Roxas. Watch your language." She smiled as she waved her finger around while I grumbled my displeasure. "Why don't we come over to your place tomorrow?" she asked with a dainty giggle.

"We?" I fixed her with a quizzical look. "Who's _we_?"

"Me, Kairi, Olette, and Selphie of course." She said it as though it was it was to be expected. "We can totally talk to you about it."

"Um…how about no?" I rolled my eyes. "It might turn me into an actual gay. Hanging out with no-one but a bunch of girls…" I sighed as I pinched at the bridge of my nose.

"Then why don't you hang out with your brother and his friends?" she suggested with a slight tilt of her head.

I stared at her disbelievingly. "Um…In case you haven't noticed. Sora is gay."

"Right." She smiled. "What about Hayner, Pence and Tidus?"

"Don't know about Pence, but I've seen Tidus hand around this guy a few times. I've only seen the back of his head though. Looks like a skunk now that I think about it." I gripped my chin in thought as I turned away from Namine. "But Hayner is gay too…" I trailed off and realization suddenly hits me over with a bloody pot. "Holy shit!" I grabbed my hair in frustration and nearly tore it out. "They're turning me gay!!!"

And then she laughed at me again.

* * *

I can't believe all that happened yesterday after school.

There was a knock on my door, which made me come back out of my thoughts. I walked over to it, grabbed the door knob, gave it a little twist and opened it slightly.

"Yes…?" I peered at the blonde girl through the crack.

"Roxas, why aren't you coming downstairs? Sora is having fun." She smiled as she tried to look at me through the crack.

And surely, I could hear my brother's laughter filter through the house walls along with the other girls. "I don't wanna be gay." I almost cried but held it back. "Shit…" I cursed and ignored her, "Roxas, watch your language." As I thought to myself, 'I _am_ turning gay." I let out another aggravated sigh.

"Well," she placed a finger on her chin as she tilted her head up to the ceiling, "If it's guys you wanna hang out with, I know a few friends that wouldn't mind." She offered, "They're not gay by the way." She giggled again.

"Really?" I opened the door a little more. "So they like normal things…Like cars and sports…and girls…" I felt a little embarrassed talking about it.

"Yup." She nodded and smiled.

I fully opened the door, "Ok, I'm up for it."

"Great." She clapped her hands together, "I'll call Demyx up and ask him about it."

"Demyx huh?" I smiled and immediately started to imagine what this 'Demyx' looked like. "Sounds like a cool name." I can see it now…A real playboy with the girls.

This is gonna be great.

But he didn't turn out the way I thought he would be. And again, I wondered, why.

I turned to Namine and forced on a smile. "You told me they weren't gay." I grated out, loud enough for only her ears to hear.

"They're not gay." She smiled, "They're bi. It's a completely different thing Roxas." She brought up her hand in a horrible effort to suppress her giggle. I bet she's really enjoying this…

Damn her…Trying to cajole me into turning gay. I scowled as I slowly turned my head back to the front to the boys that were sitting at the table, chatting to each other.

Namine has a thing for 'yaoi', more like an obsession really. She's a great artist. Very detailed. I happened to stumble upon her sketchbooks one day. And the pictures I saw will be forever burned and engraved into my poor brain.

Wasn't she making a comic too? Yeah, about two guys. Forbidden love…Whatever. I think I'll stop right there.

"Hey guys!" she called out to them and ignored by sputtering protests. "This is Roxas," she gestured to me, "I told you about him yesterday remember?" she spoke to a guy that had both a mullet and a mohawk for a hair-do.

"Hey Roxas." The one I'm assuming to be Demyx waved at me. I merely waved back, albeit nervously and awkwardly.

"Yo, who's the twerp?" a voice from behind me sounded and I felt my eye twitch at the horrible nickname.

'Steady…' I took a deep breath, "My name, is Roxas." And as I turned around to glare and curse at whoever the jerk was, "Jack-as-" I did something I only thought would happen in stories, movies, books and comics. I completely forgot what I was gonna say and I ogled at him.

For a span of ten seconds. More or less, but it was still pretty long if you asked me.

'Shit…' I slowly turned back to Namine who was giggling behind her hand. 'I guess I _am_ gay.' I glared at the blonde girl and forced up a smile, 'Thanks a lot Namine.'

"Oh Roxas!" the boy behind me voiced out, "You're the kid that Demyx said was gonna meet up with us today."

I merely nodded and refused to turn back to acknowledge the red headed stranger.

"Namine, outside, talk, now." I demanded and she followed obediently with a smile.

And once we were outside, and out of earshot, I harshly whispered to her, "Namine, what are you trying to do?"

"Trying to help you of course." She stated all knowingly.

I snorted as her horrible attempt, "Well, it's not working!"

"Roxas." Her smile faded as she placed her hands on my shoulder. "Maybe it's about time you found out about yourself."

"What?" I spat out disbelievingly. "What are you on about." I asked her rhetorically.

"There's no point in denying it Roxas."

"Denying what?!"

She ignored me, "If you're gay, then you're gay."

"I'm not gay…"

Again, she ignored me, "You can't choose what sex," I shuddered slightly at that word, "You can fall in love with." She started rambling on about love, I bet she's thinking about her yaoi comics now. "Love happens very suddenly, and well, if the person you're in love with happens to be the same sex as you, well, you just gotta accept it." she had a gentle smile on her face.

I felt my shoulders relax suddenly. "Namine…" I whined, "I-I…" I smacked my forehead. "This is so wrong. My parent's are gonna kill me. Sora is gonna laugh at me, Hayner is gonna end up putting moves on me. And I'll end up being dragged all over town to go shopping because of you girls!" I pointed at her accusingly the realization hits me like a flying pot to the head, "Namine…" I hissed, "You planned this all along didn't you?" I sneered at her.

"Whatever are you talking about Roxas?" she smiled sweetly at the mild sarcasm in her voice and I forced on another smile.

"Why you…manipulative witch…" I couldn't think of anything better (or worse) to call her, but she merely giggled at my insult.

"Shall we go in?" she moved towards the door back into the café that she said we were all going to meet.

"Sure, whatever…" I shrugged as I followed her in, "Can't fight the flow."

"Ok everybody, this is Roxas." She smiled as she clapped her hands together. "Roxas, this is everybody." She turned to me and gestured to the boys.

"Hey Roxas," they greeted me simultaneously.

"I'm Demyx." The dirty haired blond with the half mullet and mohawk came up to me and started shaking my hand.

"Xigbar." Another replied in a bored tone. I turned my head to the guy who spoke and my eyes almost popped out of their sockets.

"You!" I pointed at the guy with the pony tail. "You're the guy who hangs around Tidus a lot!"

"You know Tidus?" he asked suddenly, seemingly curious and interested.

"Yeah, he's a friend of mine." I spoke, and wondered about the connection between the two of them. They don't seem connected in any way what so ever. And well…it scared me to know that Tidus hangs around a guy with a freaking eye patch.

"Huh…ok whatever." He shrugged and waved his hand around and the next person was then introduced by the bubbly blond boy.

'Are they really not gay…?' I thought to myself as I watched the blond boy who had been in front of me skipped over to the other boy with half of his face covered by slate colored hair.

"This is Zexion. He's the quiet emo of the group." The said person's visible eye twitched slightly at the mention of the word 'emo'.

'Yup…' I smiled awkwardly and nodded, 'Total emo…' a shadow suddenly loomed over me and I held back a squeak. 'Damn…I _am_ turning gay. Fucking hell…' I cursed in my head as I looked up at the person who stood in front of me.

"My name is Sai'x." he introduced himself. Frankly, I didn't see a point of him coming right up to me just to offer me his name. "Pleased to meet you Roxas." He stepped back and took his usual seat at the table.

And the last person, who was now sitting at the table with his leg crossed over the other, the one I almost called a jack-ass, and the one I was ogling at before, smirked at me.

I think I felt my heart jump.

And then my eye twitched again.

If this was a cartoon, or an anime, as Namine likes to call it, I would be thumping my head on a near-by wall right about now, with no regards what so ever to my well being.

"The name's Axel. A-X-E-L, got it memorized?" he tapped his forehead as he spoke.

That was just about the worst catch phrase I have ever heard, but to be honest, it actually fitted him quite nicely.

"I'll commit that to memory." I fixed him a blank stare before turning back to Namine.

"Ok, now that we all know each other, how about you guys hang out while I go shopping with the girls?" she suggested then turned to me, "Unless you wanna come along too Roxas?" she smiled.

"Ah…er…no thanks, Namine…" I kindly refused her offer. Even if I _was_ gay, I would still hate shopping. One of those qualities as a boy I'm very happy I didn't lose.

"Ok then." She smiled, "Have fun." She kissed me on the cheek and I immediately tried to wipe it off.

She giggled, waved and then walked away. The boys behind me were snickering too.

Damn, did she really have to do that in front of other people? I bet she's doing it just to embarrass and spite me. Damn Namine…embarrassing me like that in front of a bunch of emo, bi people…

"So Roxas," the one named Axel smirked at me, "What do you do for fun?"

"Random things," I replied casually as I stuck my hands into my pockets.

"Excellent." He widened his smirk, "That's a hobby of ours, you'll fit right in." they laughed.

I hung out with them the whole day, and I noticed that there was a lot of hostility and ridicule being shot at us. I hated it and I just wanted to punch their faces in. Regardless of whether they were a boy or girl.

Probably having sensed my growing anger and foul mood, the red head swung his arm around my shoulder and I looked up to glare at him.

"It happens a lot," he started talking to me, "We tuned it out after a while. I'm sure you'll eventually tune it out too."

"Ok fine, whatever. Take your arm off." I shrugged his arm away and he merely chuckled. It sounded nice…and I felt my eye twitch again.

'Namine…you're the worst friend I have ever had the pleasure of making…' I thought to myself as I continued to walk with the group that ignored the looks of disgust.

How can they act as though nobody was glaring and gossiping about them? They just walked past and acted as though it was fine.

It's not fine…

If this is what it's gonna be like, I don't wanna be gay.

'I don't wanna be gay…'

"Fags…" a group of people sneered out as they walked past. I felt my last bit of patience and tolerance finally leaving me.

I turned around, and shouted to them, "What the fuck are your fucking problems huh?!" I pointed as them as they turned around. "If you've got a fucking problem with us then just fuck off, bit-!" it was then I was cut short when a hand covered my mouth and I was forcibly dragged away by the red head while kicking and with muffled protests.

Finally, after a good bit of distance, I tore myself away from his grip but I was still angry beyond belief. "Why aren't you doing anything?! How can you guys just let them say shit like that?! It's pissing me off!"

"Look Roxas, it's not like we like it either-" the red head started but I cut him off before he could say anymore.

"Then say something!" I stomped my foot on the ground.

I acted like a total girl…

"And then what?" his features turned into a glare, "Even if we said something, it's not like they're gonna shut up about it."

I pursed my lips together as I glared at them defiantly. Demyx looked sad, Zexion looked indifferent, Sai'x looked away, Xigbar looked as though he couldn't care less. The red head looked fed up.

I turned my head away from them, "This is fucking bullshit." I swore and decided that it was enough.

I walked away.

I didn't know how long I had been walking for, or how far, but by the time I noticed my surroundings, I was in a completely different place.

I wasn't lost per se, I could still see the university's clock tower peeking out from behind the tall trees. At least I can back-track my steps.

I sighed and spotted a park bench nearby and took a seat. I relaxed a little and looked up at the sky through the thick foliage of the tress hanging above me, and tried to forget what happened earlier in the day.

I let out another tired sigh and closed my eyes, and listened to the rustling of the leaves and the feeling of the soft gentle wind that breezed past.

I heard foot steps, but I assumed it to be just some passer-by and ignored them. I didn't notice that the foot steps stopped somewhere near by.

"Are you still angry?"

'I know that voice.' I opened my eyes to see a red head standing in front of me and I considered the question, 'Honestly, I don't even know myself but I _do_ feel a little tired.' I merely shrugged.

"Here." He handed me a can of soda.

I stared back at him puzzled, "What for?"

"Just take it." he scowled a little.

I slowly reached up and took it, and as soon as he let go of the can, he took the empty seat next to mine and opened his own drink.

"Where are the others?" I asked as I stared at the cool drink in my hands, enjoying the condensation slipping down my fingers and dripping off to the ground.

"They're somewhere." He answered as he drank his soda.

I nodded in understanding, why would anybody wanna hang out with a kid with absolutely no tolerance for insults and mockery?

But now that I think about it, I was still a little angry at their reactions, but at the same time, I was ashamed of my own.

We sat on the bench in relative silence with the occasional slurp coming from the red head. Eventually, he spoke, "Are you gonna drink that?" he asked as he pointed at the unopened drink in my hands.

I stared at him, then stared back at the can, then offered it back to him.

He placed the empty can on the floor and stomped on it with his shoe, flattened it before he picked it back up and placed it beside him. Once he was done with that, he took back the drink he gave me and made a face.

"Eww, it's warm."

I laughed a little at his comment and he chuckled along with me. For a while, we just sat at the bench, Axel just drinking the soda, and me just staring at nothing in particular.

"How do you guys cope?" I asked after a bit of silence.

"Hmm?"

"You know," I couldn't bring myself to look at him, "All the jeers and insults." I furrowed my eyebrows.

"Dunno," he shrugged, "We just ignore them."

"Maybe now you ignore them, but what about then?"

"It was…" there was a slight pause, "Hard I admit."

I turned my head to face him, there was a look of serenity on his face. I wanted to look away, but I couldn't bring myself to.

"We were all pretty conscious about it." he stared at the drink in his hands and swirled it around just a little, "But you know, we got use to it." he shrugged as he brought the can up to his lips again.

"Why do you put up with it?"

He glanced at me then grinned, "They're just jealous of us because we choose to be different."

I felt a smile on my face and I turned away again.

"Hey, you should smile more often." He leaned forward just slightly and poked me on my shoulder.

I instantly felt a frown appear on my face.

"Don't frown so much."

"I can frown as much as I want." I challenged him with another glare.

"I think you should smile more, like you did just now."

"Why should I?" my voice was laced with malice. I never knew I could speak in that particular tone.

"Because you don't know who might be falling in love with your smile."

I rolled my eyes and turned my head away, feeling a small blush on my cheeks, "Talk about corny."

"Hey, it was worth a shot. And it totally worked." I felt him poke at my reddening cheek.

"Shut up," I smacked the hand away and turned back to the red head before giving him a half hearted punch to his arm.

I wasn't comfortable with my newly found sexual orientation yet, but at least I knew that I wasn't the only one going through insecurity after insecurity. And at least now, I have a few more friends that have the same thing in common as me.

They weren't all that bad as when I first thought they would be.

We spent the rest of the day at the arcade with the group, we raced each other, played first shooter games, tried to measure our strength using a punching bag and a game that required a mallet, we played pool on those cheap, slanted tables and horrible cue sticks, we danced to the DDR machine, played the electric guitar and drumming game.

We somehow managed to find a way to sync the two machines together and played a few games on them. We tried winning a couple of prizes from the crane machine, and we tried our luck trying to win a few tickets to claim spot prizes with.

We only managed to get forty five. The minimum we needed to get the cheapest prize was a hundred and fifty. In my opinion, it just wasn't worth the effort and the money.

At the end of the day, we all somehow managed to squeeze into a photo booth and had our sticker photos taken.

On one of the photos, Demyx had his tongue stuck out, Zexion and Sai'x looked indifferent and Axel messed up my hair. On another photo, Demyx made a face, Zexion and Sai'x still looked indifferent, and Axel pulled at my cheeks. On another photo, Demyx tried playing air guitar, Zexion looked embarrassed this time, Sai'x still remained indifferent and Axel made me look like I had rabbit ears. And on the last photo, Demyx kissed Zexion on the cheek and the camera caught him with a blush on his face. Sai'x had quirked up an eyebrow at the public display of affection, Axel had his face right next to my cheeks which were stained pink.

Xigbar looked as though he wanted to shoot someone in every single one of them.

Me, Axel and Demyx laughed as the photos were printed out. There were only 16 photo stickers, Sai'x and Xigbar didn't want any so the four of us took four each. I stuck them all in my wallet.

At first, I've always wondered why. But really, it should've been why not.

But really though, even though I had been hanging out with Axel and the others for almost 2 weeks or so, I still wasn't used to his stupid and random questions.

"So, who did you turn gay for?" he asked and ignored me as I hacked and coughed into my ginger beer drink.

"W-what?" I managed to choke out after a while and I stared at him disbelievingly.

The other guys went off somewhere to get some beer, drinks and vodka. Me and Axel stayed behind in the park.

"Who, did, you, turn, gay, for?" he repeated and enunciated every word as though I was stupid. I wasn't stupid. In fact, I think I'm smarter than him.

The question still caught me off guard but I thought about it, "I didn't turn gay for anybody. I just don't, like, girls?" I replied, and felt a little ashamed of my meek voice.

"Ok then," he tapped his chin in thought and then turned back to me again with inquisitive green eyes, "Who would you turn gay for?" he rephrased his question and I almost spat out my drink as I brought it up to my lips.

"What?!"

"Who, would, you-"

"No, I got that, but why the fuck are you asking me these weird questions?" I quirked up an eyebrow in mixed curiosity.

"Because you answer them." He grinned and I suddenly felt played.

Fine then, if that's how he wanted it, I'll play along with him, "It depends if they'll turn gay for me or not." I answered half truthfully and hoped that the conversation would be over.

But I should've known that once I got the conversation going, Axel would make sure it kept going until he got bored with it. And he was far from bored now.

"Oh really now?" he smirked.

I liked that smirk, but right now, I didn't like it so much.

"So, if I said I turned gay for you, would you turn gay for me?"

I had to force myself to look away from his face. It was drawing me in closer than what I thought was comfortable. For a guy, at least.

"Dude, you _are_ gay-"

"Bi."

"Whatever." I waved my hand at the comment, "As for me, I'm still not sure. Maybe bi." I shrugged and took another sip from my drink.

"Ok, so we're half way there."

I really couldn't see from his point of view. What was going through that guy's head? I had absolutely no idea. His sense of logic is just totally _whacked_ sometimes.

"Ok, let me ask again," he cleared his throat, wiped the smirk off his face and stared at me, "If I asked you to go out with me, would you say yes?"

I didn't know what I was doing, or what I was thinking, but my fingers went slack, I dropped my drink on the ground and it fell over and the bubbly contents pooled out.

"W-what?" I wasn't sure if I had heard correctly, but my heart double its speed and I felt heat rush to my face and I suddenly felt uncomfortably hot.

"Will you go out with me? I mean, we're both bi right?"

The words got stuck in my throat, I didn't know what to do, too many thoughts ran through my mind and it all became nothing but a jumbled mess.

I didn't know what kind of expression I had on my face, but Axel just suddenly leaned closer and kissed me.

He fucking kissed me, goddammit.

…It was my first kiss too…The bastard.

I threw a punch at him, on his shoulder of course, didn't want to hurt that 'pretty face' of his.

"You hit like a girl." He chuckled once he broke the kiss and stared at me.

I scowled as I forced my eyes away and tried to suppress the stupid, heated blush from my cheeks, "Shut up."

"So it's official that you're bottom and I'm top then." He smirked, clearly enjoying the torment that he was putting me through.

"I said, shut up." I growled out, pulled at the front part of his shirt and went in for another kiss.

Axel wasn't so sure about that top and bottom claim anymore, but he still tried.

* * *

Er…Is this my first attempt for a first person point of view? I believe so…Wow…Hoorah for me…Well, anyways. I liked the ending. Lols.

Remember to review if you enjoyed it! Tell me what you think and etcetera. Lawls.


End file.
